How to affair-proof your marriage

By Brad Rhoads

The closer you are to God, the further you are from an affair. This is the simple truth. As believers, we know it’s important to be close to God. But, how do we stay close to Him through all of the busyness of work, family, and yes, our marriage?

Often, our marriage relationship is the first thing to drift in the busyness of life. Here’s a quick reminder for how to affair-proof your marriage. 

How to affair-proof your marriage


My son, keep my words and treasure up my commandments with you; keep my commandments and live; keep my teaching as the apple of your eye; bind them on your fingers; write them on the tablet of your heart. Say to wisdom, “You are my sister,” and call insight your intimate friend, to keep you from the forbidden woman, from the adulteress with her smooth words. —Proverbs 7:1-5


AFFAIR ________________________________________GOD


The visual of a line drawn like above is helpful to me. God is on the right. Bad things are on the left. You have to steer away from God in order to do bad things. 

In order to commit adultery, so many small decisions took place over a long period of time. Thoughts turned to actions and full-on betrayal.

I've heard it said that the spouse who meets another person to commit adultery didn't simply make that decision on that in one evening. There were a thousand different decisions made over days, weeks, months, and possibly years.

God instructs us to read, value, meditate and obey Scripture so God protects us from the smooth-talking, forbidden, and the tempting person who makes us feel beautiful and respected. 


Simply stated, the more you value Scripture, the less likely you are to end up in bed with another person. One study found that forty-one percent of marriages experience infidelity at some point. Imagine that! This causes profound and multi-generational relational, spiritual, and emotional pain.

You will not find hope for marriage in yourself or the world. Hope for your marriage must be found in your relationship to God. The closer our mind is to His Word and wisdom, the less likely it will be grabbed by the alluring and temporary ecstasy of the forbidden.

Remember, the spouse who wakes up in the morning and has the discipline and relationship with God to dig in and make that relationship the priority, those spouses are not the ones who end the day in the wrong person's arms. 


Grace Marriage Mission

Recommit to reading and studying God’s Word. Recommit your relationship and priorities to God. If possible, pick a certain time each day to spend with God and His Word—not to check off like some laundry list—but for a true and honest relationship with Him.

The Grace Marriage Checkup